The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's traffic school.  YIKES!

Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for?  He can't see my license plate.

Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at
the same time?
A: The pick-up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying,
"Guns don't kill people. I do."

Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car?
A: Always wear a condom.

Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.

Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too dumb to find your car keys.

Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving? A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer
drive lawfully?
A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a
flashing yellow traffic light?
A: The color.

Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A: Heavy psychedelics. 

Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer?
A: It would be tough to be a flatfoot all day long.